It’s been a long time since I wrote a blog article and am honoured to write one for Harmless – my only problem is keeping it concise.
My struggles with mental health issues and self-harm began when I was 15, and although I had various support from medical professionals over the years, it wasn’t until I was 28 and my marriage suddenly ended that I hit rock bottom. Although it was an awful time, it was also a blessing in disguise as the experience allowed me to get the help I needed to start to really address my underlying mental health issues which were behind my self-harm.
At my lowest point I had a four day stay in Maytree, a charity in London which is a sanctuary for the suicidal. I was also lucky enough to receive two years of person-centred counselling along with group support (and not forgetting the support of some extremely good friends) from a charity similar to Harmless in my area which sadly no longer exists. I then had a year of psychodynamic therapy from the NHS which allowed me to really explore my childhood issues, and the support of an amazing CPN. Although I am now discharged from the mental health services, I still have access to her if I need the support.
It was a very long and difficult road towards recovery, and accessing help was a battle. I enjoy sharing my experiences with others in the hope that it will help. I have delivered a lot of self-harm awareness and personality disorder training, and this has also helped me immensely, and is something I hope to get back into doing. Five years after being at my lowest point I have a fantastic boyfriend, and the most amazing little one year old boy who brings me so much happiness. Although I still have my struggles, and I can’t say that I will never self-harm again as I don’t know what the future holds, getting the help I needed turned my life around, and I feel so lucky to be here.
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